A Happiness Journey


Don’t believe everything you think

Your outer world is very simply a reflection of your inner world. Anything that you do or don’t have in your external world, represents what you do and don’t have in your internal world. That may sound a little woo-woo so let me get into the science of it.


Your mind is the only reason you don’t have everything you want in life and your mind colours the way you view every single thing in your external world. It does this by creating a filter through which you look at everything.


Most people are identified and attached to their minds; they believe they ARE their mind, that the voice narrating away in their head is their voice using their words.


You are NOT your mind. You are not even the thoughts that you have in your head. You HAVE thoughts. You HAVE a mind. Your mind is a part of you but it isn’t you. You are not the voice in your head, you are the one listening to the voice.


Your mind is like a supercomputer and every action or decision you take is created by a different file you have stored inside the computer. Just as with any computer, there are programmes running continuously in the background that you are not even aware of. This is necessary because there simply isn’t enough time in the day to think consciously about all the processes your body needs to go through to live. On a micro level you can’t be thinking about how to beat your heart or digest your lunch and on a macro level you can’t be wasting your time thinking about how to drive your car or tie your shoe laces.


Everything is Neutral

Everything you see, hear, sense and smell, your mind will search back through the files and assign a meaning to it, based on similar situations that have occurred in the past. Your mind makes the judgement call based on old stored information. It is the creation of each of these meanings that determines your life, and how you see and interact with the world and the people in it. Everything out there is neutral, then we give it meaning using our own interpretations. So, nothing is anything until we make it something, then it becomes what we have made it. Based on this information it is easy to understand that every single person has an entirely different and unique meaning that they will assign to the exact same thing that we were looking at. What makes us all the same is that we are all going through life using the same biological processes. What makes us all different are the meanings and interpretations we create. It’s our own subjective views that make this world such a different place and experience for each of us and our reality is highly personal.


Our thoughts are not OUR thoughts

We are conceived and born with empty hard drives (if I continue with the computer metaphor) and from the second we have senses, we are downloading information onto our hard drive. This information comes from everywhere; the people around us, the conversations in the room, the media on TV and radio, the things we hear on the street, what we learn at school etc. It is hardwired into our genetic makeup for survival that we need to download as much information as we possibly can, as quickly as we can, so our tribe will accept us and so that we can contribute and stay alive when threats appear. It is for this reason that 80% of your brain development happens before you are 7 years old. For this to be possible a child’s brain waves are in Theta brain wave, which is the same as a hypnotic state. You hear the saying that children’s minds are like sponges; well they literally are. In the theta brain wave state, we can learn and absorb so much more information than we can do as adults in the beta brain wave state. Once this information is taken in at this early age, it is committed to our hard drives, our subconscious, and it forms the information behind the programs that continuously run our daily lives in the background. With this being said, you can now clearly see that the thoughts that we have running our programs are not our own, they are what we have taken in from all the external stimuli around us. Is everything you have ever been told by another person true? No, of course it isn’t. Given that it is the information we have picked up from other people that form our thoughts then, is it possible that our thoughts might not be true either? So, who’s opinion is it? Is it your opinion or is it recycled information from someone else’s opinion? The information you received at the time was what they believed to be true at the time, but times change.


So your mind is not who you are, it is who you learned to be. Now you know your mind is full of other people’s information you can separate yourself from it and not take it all as gospel. This gives you CHOICE. Now you are separate from your voice you can choose to be objective and choose whether or not to listen to it.



The reason you absorbed all this information so early in your life was for one reason and one reason only. Survival. Your subconscious programming doesn’t care if you’re happy, peaceful or successful, it cares that you survive. It doesn’t like scary, it likes safe and comfortable. As your mind is a survival mechanism it’s #1 job is protection, to look out for danger, and so it has a natural bias toward the negative. It naturally wants to look a little harder at the bad stuff because the good stuff can’t hurt you. So your mind is designed to naturally pick up all the problems and fear, to keep you safe. Like an overprotective worried parent it sees every danger around every corner, but like a worried parent, if you spend every second listening to it, it will drive you crazy. The only way this overprotective mechanism can keep you safe is by controlling your life and the only way it can do that is to convince you it is your life.


As our minds are designed to constantly look for, and find problems, there are always more problems to find. We never feel like we are finally safe because there are always more problems to address around the corner. And if it can’t find a problem is has no qualms about creating one from thin air. Nit-picking, making a mountain from a mole hill or completely overreacting to a situation is the minds way of creating a problem where there doesn’t need to be one.


So what can we do?

Don’t always believe the voice in your head.

Don’t believe every thought you think.

Remember that this thought is coming from a program that is designed to find threats and it is using files written by someone else. You get to choose to take your thoughts with a pinch of salt. You get to decide whether your thoughts are aligned with your goals and if they’re not, you get to change your thoughts if you don’t like the ones you’re having.


This is the definition of consciousness, living through the choices you make in the present moment rather than the programming and habits you have from the past.


How to tame the worry wort that is your mind

Your mind likes to be acknowledged. Like the worrying parent it does not like to be ignored, so the best thing you can do to appease it is to acknowledge it. A simple “Thank you for sharing” can help stop a negative thought or fear before it gains more momentum.


When a thought comes into your head, question it. Does this sound like a criticism or something negative? Is this thought empowering to me? Do I want to entertain this thought? No? “Thank you for sharing”. Then create the new and improved version, insert the thought you want to think.


If you don’t manage your mind, then your mind will manage you. Your greatest power is your ability to choose your own thoughts.


In the words of Mahatma Ghandi:

“Your thoughts become your words, your words become your actions, your actions become your habits, your habits become your values, and your values become your destiny.”

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